This is a new service that we will be offering through our website.
Virtual Coaching is a computer based approach to problem solving and decision making.
People who have difficulty in these areas frequently consult professionals such as counselors, motivators, or organizers in their local community.
If an individual cannot find the help they need in their locale due to a lack of providers, inability to develop a relationship with available providers, or the desire for a particular approach, there are some great services available on the internet.
One area in which virtual coaching can be especially successful is the area of Home, Office or Personal Organizing.
The process is similar to working with a professional organizer face to face in your home or office. The teamwork, accountability, task management, and organizational coaching are all part of a comprehensive, personalized plan to help guide you through the steps of the Organizational process and the re-enforcement required for developing new and lasting habits.
Sappari Solutions will take you through this process with a personal plan tailored to your particular circumstances.
We start with a general questionnaire to establish the set of issues that the client is dealing with, and then move on to a more detailed, individualized set of questions to identify the particular areas that need attention and the methods that will work best for the client's needs and style.
Telephone or computer chat conferencing are then the means of working with the client to achieve each step of the organizational process and habit setting.
These steps are accomplished incrementally, and with the clients particular needs and working styles in mind. Each step forward is guided and re-enforced by your organizer, and supported by written documentation of your sessions and email support. There are also many online documents, websites, and other materials that your organizer will provide, to help you as you work through the process.
The client has the ability to decide how much support is needed and how long the process will continue. From one job, such as sorting papers and setting up a filing system, to a whole house makeover and family habit-building.
The virtual approach may be the perfect way to bring order and peace into your home with professionals that have the experience and resources to help make it a new way of life.
Monday, October 20, 2008
Friday, August 22, 2008
Organizing your Homeschool- Time
Time- Time management can prove to be a real challenge to new home schoolers, or people who do not have a habit of being structured.
No matter what your teaching style, there are several issues to consider as you plan and develop your homeschool year.
I can't speak to the child-directed teaching styles, but the others all require a certain amount of structured time, from a fairly relaxed schedule to one that is highly structured.
From a packaged curriculum, which involves being accountable to a third party, to co-ops, in which several families decide on the schedule, to the homegrown curriculum, there is going to be a required amount of time that has to be set aside for schooling.
Some families are very unstructured and relaxed about when and how they school. If this is a proven method and the children are thriving educationally, then no changes are needed.
However, many families find that a lack of structured time spent schooling encourages poor study and work habits and allows the year to pass with a less than optimal result.
Remember:
A few proven methods for managing your day:
1. Start at the same time each day. Figure out how much time you need in the day to get the work done. Then figure out how long it takes for the family to get up, eat breakfast, and get the morning chores done. Get everyone up early enough to get started on time AND get them to bed early enough to allow for a good night's sleep.
2. Lay out some kind of agenda for the day. Some people need to adhere to a schedule of subjects and provide their kids with a set amount of time for each one. Other people can just have the list of subjects laid out and let the kids go through them and finish within a reasonable amount of time. As long as you finish the assignments that you assigned that day, it's going to be a personal decision as to how strict you are about the schedule. Some kids need more routine than others. Boys, I have found, need frequent breaks to blow off energy. My system is three subjects and a break, 15 minutes or so. (Math=three subjects.)
3. Be the teacher! You are pulled in a dozen different directions all day long, but do resist the urge to answer the phone, do housework, or schedule appointments during the school day. I have caller ID. I do make exceptions when it comes to the phone, as I have two grown daughters with young children and occasionally there is an "Emergency".
I have had doctors say "Oh, we love Homeschoolers because they can come in in the morning." Well, no. School is our job and we don't just take whatever appointment is most convenient for the doctor. The rest of the world needs to see that you are a teacher, just like any teacher, and your job is your primary concern.
4. Use a planner and calendar. Use both! Teacher's planners are not only vital for keeping school records and for scheduling, they can keep the day moving along by providing an objective measure of time that you can point to when you and your students are feeling less than ambitious. You can see that there are subjects that you have to finish and the kids realize that it's not you driving them, it's the tasks of the day.
5. Try to make the most of the morning hours. This is the most productive time of the day. The momentum is much greater. The tougher subjects like math, English, etc. need the most attention. I usually make sure that they are done before lunch. We have a very hard time getting back on track if we go anywhere and then try to come back and do school.
These are just suggestions, every family has to try different methods and tweak the system, even if we have been at it for years!
No matter what your teaching style, there are several issues to consider as you plan and develop your homeschool year.
I can't speak to the child-directed teaching styles, but the others all require a certain amount of structured time, from a fairly relaxed schedule to one that is highly structured.
From a packaged curriculum, which involves being accountable to a third party, to co-ops, in which several families decide on the schedule, to the homegrown curriculum, there is going to be a required amount of time that has to be set aside for schooling.
Some families are very unstructured and relaxed about when and how they school. If this is a proven method and the children are thriving educationally, then no changes are needed.
However, many families find that a lack of structured time spent schooling encourages poor study and work habits and allows the year to pass with a less than optimal result.
Remember:
- Homeschooling isn't a hobby or pastime. Homeschooling is your job.
- Time in the classroom will be more productive if you stay on task with your kids.
- Boys and girls often need different schedules.
- You are not just teaching academic subjects, you are also teaching your children discipline and good habits.
- Others will take you more seriously.
A few proven methods for managing your day:
1. Start at the same time each day. Figure out how much time you need in the day to get the work done. Then figure out how long it takes for the family to get up, eat breakfast, and get the morning chores done. Get everyone up early enough to get started on time AND get them to bed early enough to allow for a good night's sleep.
2. Lay out some kind of agenda for the day. Some people need to adhere to a schedule of subjects and provide their kids with a set amount of time for each one. Other people can just have the list of subjects laid out and let the kids go through them and finish within a reasonable amount of time. As long as you finish the assignments that you assigned that day, it's going to be a personal decision as to how strict you are about the schedule. Some kids need more routine than others. Boys, I have found, need frequent breaks to blow off energy. My system is three subjects and a break, 15 minutes or so. (Math=three subjects.)
3. Be the teacher! You are pulled in a dozen different directions all day long, but do resist the urge to answer the phone, do housework, or schedule appointments during the school day. I have caller ID. I do make exceptions when it comes to the phone, as I have two grown daughters with young children and occasionally there is an "Emergency".
I have had doctors say "Oh, we love Homeschoolers because they can come in in the morning." Well, no. School is our job and we don't just take whatever appointment is most convenient for the doctor. The rest of the world needs to see that you are a teacher, just like any teacher, and your job is your primary concern.
4. Use a planner and calendar. Use both! Teacher's planners are not only vital for keeping school records and for scheduling, they can keep the day moving along by providing an objective measure of time that you can point to when you and your students are feeling less than ambitious. You can see that there are subjects that you have to finish and the kids realize that it's not you driving them, it's the tasks of the day.
5. Try to make the most of the morning hours. This is the most productive time of the day. The momentum is much greater. The tougher subjects like math, English, etc. need the most attention. I usually make sure that they are done before lunch. We have a very hard time getting back on track if we go anywhere and then try to come back and do school.
These are just suggestions, every family has to try different methods and tweak the system, even if we have been at it for years!
Friday, July 25, 2008
Organizing your Homeschool (part 1)
There are as many ways to homeschool as there are families homeschooling. Every family has their own flavor, their own style. There is an important constant, though, that just makes any homeschool run better and smoother, especially during the more challenging times.
That constant is Organization.
It is one of the most important keys to success in educating at home.
Why should a Homeschooling family be organized?
1. Better organization = Easier and better instruction.
2 Accountability- We want to be able to lay hands on our records and on the kids' work when review time comes, or in the event of questions regarding your educational program. This also applies to the home itself. We may be scrutinized by others officially or personally.
3. Example- We are not just teaching our kids to be academically outstanding, we are giving them tools for life. If we allow ourselves and our homes to become disordered, we do not encourage them to take their studies seriously, and, in the case of some children, make it impossible to learn. The habits that we use to keep order are the same habits that we need to keep the school day on track and the children focused.
There are four main areas that we need to look at in becoming more organized as Homeschoolers.
Time, Space, Materials, and Records.
That constant is Organization.
It is one of the most important keys to success in educating at home.
Why should a Homeschooling family be organized?
1. Better organization = Easier and better instruction.
2 Accountability- We want to be able to lay hands on our records and on the kids' work when review time comes, or in the event of questions regarding your educational program. This also applies to the home itself. We may be scrutinized by others officially or personally.
3. Example- We are not just teaching our kids to be academically outstanding, we are giving them tools for life. If we allow ourselves and our homes to become disordered, we do not encourage them to take their studies seriously, and, in the case of some children, make it impossible to learn. The habits that we use to keep order are the same habits that we need to keep the school day on track and the children focused.
There are four main areas that we need to look at in becoming more organized as Homeschoolers.
Time, Space, Materials, and Records.
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Switching Gears...
With summer here I find myself in that difficult position of shifting schedules and routines.
The boys are sleeping in, we are doing a couple of subjects in school, but not much, and we are not keeping the same hours at bedtime.
I am trying to keep the same routine as far as housework, but it is tough when I get involved in a project that I don't ordinarily have time for during the school year. I find myself starting things and then moving on to another job before I finish the first one. A big NO NO. I know, I know I should let it go and relax, but I know from long experience that if I do that I will be sorry when I am trying to remediate the disorder later. It has to be done sometime.
I am keeping the boys on their morning chores and the daily pick-up of belongings. That is important or I will lose all the good habits that we worked so hard to build over the past few months. Morning is the time for structured tasks. They are used to making beds, picking up the floor and putting away their laundry. They are very good about keeping things picked up around the house. I don't really ever nag. I remind them that it's almost lunch time and the toys need to be picked up and they get right to it. If we are having company, they know what they want to put away for safekeeping. When it's time to go somewhere, we try to leave the house in a tidy condition so that no matter when we get home, we can get things ready for the next activity quickly. Well, Paul does need a lot of reminding, but for him it's not reminding because he doesn't hear it in the first place! Bless his little heart, he's going to get it. If he doesn't his future wife is going to have words for me.
Anyway, I am going to have a fine summer, after the adjustment to having "free" time. Don't I wish! When we get back to school in September....well, that's months away!
The boys are sleeping in, we are doing a couple of subjects in school, but not much, and we are not keeping the same hours at bedtime.
I am trying to keep the same routine as far as housework, but it is tough when I get involved in a project that I don't ordinarily have time for during the school year. I find myself starting things and then moving on to another job before I finish the first one. A big NO NO. I know, I know I should let it go and relax, but I know from long experience that if I do that I will be sorry when I am trying to remediate the disorder later. It has to be done sometime.
I am keeping the boys on their morning chores and the daily pick-up of belongings. That is important or I will lose all the good habits that we worked so hard to build over the past few months. Morning is the time for structured tasks. They are used to making beds, picking up the floor and putting away their laundry. They are very good about keeping things picked up around the house. I don't really ever nag. I remind them that it's almost lunch time and the toys need to be picked up and they get right to it. If we are having company, they know what they want to put away for safekeeping. When it's time to go somewhere, we try to leave the house in a tidy condition so that no matter when we get home, we can get things ready for the next activity quickly. Well, Paul does need a lot of reminding, but for him it's not reminding because he doesn't hear it in the first place! Bless his little heart, he's going to get it. If he doesn't his future wife is going to have words for me.
Anyway, I am going to have a fine summer, after the adjustment to having "free" time. Don't I wish! When we get back to school in September....well, that's months away!
Friday, May 23, 2008
Pictures
Wow!
It's been awhile!
I am currently working on getting pictures in albums and I am going to put down some ideas that I have had this evening as I have been wallowing in frustration.
Picasa, which is a Google application, has made sorting, uploading and ordering prints a snap, so to speak. When I download pictures to my computer, Picasa automatically picks them up. When I am ready to order prints, all I have to do is go to the right month, fill the tray with the pics that I want to order, click on "web albums", upload to the webpage, and they are ready to order!
There are several different places to order from.
Another nice thing about doing it this way is that the best pictures are backed up online and I can share the albums with others. If I share an album, the person I share with can then order if they want to.
Emailing out of Picasa is easy too.
I haven't been very good this year about getting photos into albums, so I have been ordering them and then stacking the envelopes in a tub to be sorted and put in albums later. BAD idea!
So, so as I am sorting, I am finding that twice I had ordered pictures and duplicated prints. Somewhere I have read that if you are organized you will save money by not buying things twice. Yes, that is certainly true. Too bad I didn't have a system set up!
Note to self: Order prints at the end of each month and put them in order in a small tub until there is time to put them in albums. This way months won't get skipped or duplicated.
New Rule # 2: When that little tub is full, it is time to do albums! Try to have the year in pictures complete for Christmas time.
Also, I usually use Shutterfly, but I noticed that Snapfish had a better price so I gave them a try. Nope, I do not like the way the prints come out. I am sticking with Shutterfly.
I have a couple more months to get done but I can't afford it right now so I have written the months on stickies and put them on the pics in the tub. I'll know where to start ordering even if I don't get to the albums for awhile.
So, this is one area where I am determined to stick to my new system. I won't have to work so hard next time!
It's been awhile!
I am currently working on getting pictures in albums and I am going to put down some ideas that I have had this evening as I have been wallowing in frustration.
Picasa, which is a Google application, has made sorting, uploading and ordering prints a snap, so to speak. When I download pictures to my computer, Picasa automatically picks them up. When I am ready to order prints, all I have to do is go to the right month, fill the tray with the pics that I want to order, click on "web albums", upload to the webpage, and they are ready to order!
There are several different places to order from.
Another nice thing about doing it this way is that the best pictures are backed up online and I can share the albums with others. If I share an album, the person I share with can then order if they want to.
Emailing out of Picasa is easy too.
I haven't been very good this year about getting photos into albums, so I have been ordering them and then stacking the envelopes in a tub to be sorted and put in albums later. BAD idea!
So, so as I am sorting, I am finding that twice I had ordered pictures and duplicated prints. Somewhere I have read that if you are organized you will save money by not buying things twice. Yes, that is certainly true. Too bad I didn't have a system set up!
Note to self: Order prints at the end of each month and put them in order in a small tub until there is time to put them in albums. This way months won't get skipped or duplicated.
New Rule # 2: When that little tub is full, it is time to do albums! Try to have the year in pictures complete for Christmas time.
Also, I usually use Shutterfly, but I noticed that Snapfish had a better price so I gave them a try. Nope, I do not like the way the prints come out. I am sticking with Shutterfly.
I have a couple more months to get done but I can't afford it right now so I have written the months on stickies and put them on the pics in the tub. I'll know where to start ordering even if I don't get to the albums for awhile.
So, this is one area where I am determined to stick to my new system. I won't have to work so hard next time!
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Planning for next year...
I spent a good part of today putting together my plan for next year.
It is always very exciting to feel another year coming to a close, but I have learned from past experience not to let the year end without looking at where we are, and thinking about where we want to go in the coming year.
If I let it go until summer and get all the paperwork filed and the books put away, it is too hard to visualize the continuum of our journey.
I was pleasantly surprised to find that I don't need to buy very much for next year.
Most of the History, Science, Math and Reading books are being handed down.
There may be a new edition or two that I will need to update with. I do have to buy a few workbooks, of course.
I have been using "Designing Your Own Classical Curriculum" rather loosely as I have gone along. I really like Laura Berquist's style. She gives a very detailed plan for each year.
There are plenty of areas where I feel that we are more successful if we step outside that plan though. Just in the different learning styles and speeds. Paul will not finish "Sound Beginnings" for example. He just doesn't need it. He is an instinctive reader, he will have a Spelling book and will start Grammar.
This is John's plan for next year:
Religion- Faith and Life Gr. 6, Wilmington Guidelines, various stories of Saints.
Math- Saxon 76
Reading- Faith and Freedom Readers, 6th and 7th.
Grammar- Easy Grammar 5 & 6
Writing- WordSmith Apprentice/Wordsmith-Love this!
Spelling- Seton Spelling 6
Poetry/Latin- Alternate Latina Christiana/Harp and Laurel Wreath
History- All ye Lands, buy @ Amazon.com
Science- Apologia Science, Botony; Usborne Science handbooks
Art- ArtinHistory.com-for use with our history program.
Literature- Free reading of titles from list in "Designing..."
Brendan 3rd/4th:
Religion- Faith and Life, 3rd grade, Wilmington Guidelines
Math- Saxon 54, need Tests and worksheets book
Reading- Faith and Freedom Readers 4th and 5th
Grammar- Easy Grammar 3/4 Workbook
Spelling- Seton Spelling 4
Writing- Type Dictation
History- Pioneers and Patriots, Evangelization..., OLDG 4th gr. teachers guide
Science- Apologia, Botony
Geography- Trailguide
Latin- Flashcards
Typing Pal/Handwriting
Art - Seton Art 4
Music- Piano Lessons
Literature- Books from List
Paul 2nd Grade:
Religion- Faith and Life 2, Wilmington Guidelines
Math- Grade 2 Abeka, Math
Reading- Faith and Freedom, 3rd and 4th
Spelling- Seton Spelling 2
Grammar- Language Lessons for the Elementary Child
History- Our America/ States and Capitals/various titles
Science- Apologia, Botony
Art- Seton Art 2
Music- Piano
Poetry- Memorize poems from Harp and Laurel Wreath.
I am going to be haunting Amazon for the next few months. I need to go get one more Abeka math book, well I will need a third grade the following year.
The most expensive item on my list is the History book that I need to get for John, but I am really excited about it. I have been looking forward to doing ancient history.
We will probably take two years to do it.
Well... Onward!
It is always very exciting to feel another year coming to a close, but I have learned from past experience not to let the year end without looking at where we are, and thinking about where we want to go in the coming year.
If I let it go until summer and get all the paperwork filed and the books put away, it is too hard to visualize the continuum of our journey.
I was pleasantly surprised to find that I don't need to buy very much for next year.
Most of the History, Science, Math and Reading books are being handed down.
There may be a new edition or two that I will need to update with. I do have to buy a few workbooks, of course.
I have been using "Designing Your Own Classical Curriculum" rather loosely as I have gone along. I really like Laura Berquist's style. She gives a very detailed plan for each year.
There are plenty of areas where I feel that we are more successful if we step outside that plan though. Just in the different learning styles and speeds. Paul will not finish "Sound Beginnings" for example. He just doesn't need it. He is an instinctive reader, he will have a Spelling book and will start Grammar.
This is John's plan for next year:
Religion- Faith and Life Gr. 6, Wilmington Guidelines, various stories of Saints.
Math- Saxon 76
Reading- Faith and Freedom Readers, 6th and 7th.
Grammar- Easy Grammar 5 & 6
Writing- WordSmith Apprentice/Wordsmith-Love this!
Spelling- Seton Spelling 6
Poetry/Latin- Alternate Latina Christiana/Harp and Laurel Wreath
History- All ye Lands, buy @ Amazon.com
Science- Apologia Science, Botony; Usborne Science handbooks
Art- ArtinHistory.com-for use with our history program.
Literature- Free reading of titles from list in "Designing..."
Brendan 3rd/4th:
Religion- Faith and Life, 3rd grade, Wilmington Guidelines
Math- Saxon 54, need Tests and worksheets book
Reading- Faith and Freedom Readers 4th and 5th
Grammar- Easy Grammar 3/4 Workbook
Spelling- Seton Spelling 4
Writing- Type Dictation
History- Pioneers and Patriots, Evangelization..., OLDG 4th gr. teachers guide
Science- Apologia, Botony
Geography- Trailguide
Latin- Flashcards
Typing Pal/Handwriting
Art - Seton Art 4
Music- Piano Lessons
Literature- Books from List
Paul 2nd Grade:
Religion- Faith and Life 2, Wilmington Guidelines
Math- Grade 2 Abeka, Math
Reading- Faith and Freedom, 3rd and 4th
Spelling- Seton Spelling 2
Grammar- Language Lessons for the Elementary Child
History- Our America/ States and Capitals/various titles
Science- Apologia, Botony
Art- Seton Art 2
Music- Piano
Poetry- Memorize poems from Harp and Laurel Wreath.
I am going to be haunting Amazon for the next few months. I need to go get one more Abeka math book, well I will need a third grade the following year.
The most expensive item on my list is the History book that I need to get for John, but I am really excited about it. I have been looking forward to doing ancient history.
We will probably take two years to do it.
Well... Onward!
Saturday, April 19, 2008
The Three P's
The other day I was having a conversation with another mom about how children learn to behave at Church. I have found that, with all my kids, being able to sit through Mass with patience and attention has served them very well in many, many other areas. They learn the discipline of peace and quiet and are able to discipline themselves, for appropriate amounts of time, when we are at the homes of friends, on a field trip, at a concert, listening to a presentation, or even at the movies.
We have never spent much time in the "cry room" at church. Unless a young child is actually crying and disturbing others, the only thing the cry room is good for is teaching them bad manners through the example of all the other little ones, playing with toys, eating, etc.
By the time a child is three, it is not unreasonable to expect them to sit quietly, refrain from eating and drinking, and to leave the toys at home.
I have used a system that I feel is quite realistic to gradually bring my children into full participation with the Mass.
The Three Ps are:
Peace: At three years old, I expect a child to be able to whisper, keep feet from kicking the pews, sit fairly still (no walking up and down the pew), and keep his hands to himself. I take little prayer books, laminated pictures of the family, Holy cards, and other "quiet", prayerful items.
The boys are able to keep from starving for one hour, but we always sit near the bathroom so that if they have to make a stop or have one drink, we are able to accommodate them.
Posture: At Five, I ask the children to follow the Mass with their posture. Sitting, Standing and Kneeling at the appropriate times. The Mass is such a wonderful multi-sensory experience. Even if they don't understand all of what is being read or said, they are learning about the importance of reverence and the flow of the Liturgy. They see the people kneeling and bowing, the prayerful posture, and they begin to understand why. The "extras" on Holy Days and special occasions, Incense, Bells, Flowers, all add to the sense of being in a place where something MORE is happening. There is a feeling of anticipation and mystery, Tradition and ritual, that make them feel at home within the Mass. The boys always love the Triduum. It is long, but all of the ritual and tradition from year to year bring them closer to their Catholic family.
Participation: At Seven it is time to actively participate. I encourage this before this age, but at seven, in anticipation of the Sacraments that they will receive this year, I require it. I tell them that if they are not participating in the prayers and really paying attention, they shouldn't be going to Communion, so they need to practice responding and singing as they prepare. They are old enough to receive the Body of Christ and they are old enough to be present to Him in the Mass. I have found that they understand this very well and actually embrace the new responsibility as a sign that they are growing up. It makes them feel fully a part of the larger Church.
I have really enjoyed watching my little boys become "grown-up" in the Mass. They are always willing to go to any type of church activity and it really does my Mother's heart good when my sons sing, respond and serve at the Mass. When we get ready for daily Mass on Fridays, they are happy to go and in fact, John is always very disappointed when, because of illness or weather, we can't get there.
A little etiquette can go a long way in making this a peaceful and Joyful time, every time!
We have never spent much time in the "cry room" at church. Unless a young child is actually crying and disturbing others, the only thing the cry room is good for is teaching them bad manners through the example of all the other little ones, playing with toys, eating, etc.
By the time a child is three, it is not unreasonable to expect them to sit quietly, refrain from eating and drinking, and to leave the toys at home.
I have used a system that I feel is quite realistic to gradually bring my children into full participation with the Mass.
The Three Ps are:
Peace: At three years old, I expect a child to be able to whisper, keep feet from kicking the pews, sit fairly still (no walking up and down the pew), and keep his hands to himself. I take little prayer books, laminated pictures of the family, Holy cards, and other "quiet", prayerful items.
The boys are able to keep from starving for one hour, but we always sit near the bathroom so that if they have to make a stop or have one drink, we are able to accommodate them.
Posture: At Five, I ask the children to follow the Mass with their posture. Sitting, Standing and Kneeling at the appropriate times. The Mass is such a wonderful multi-sensory experience. Even if they don't understand all of what is being read or said, they are learning about the importance of reverence and the flow of the Liturgy. They see the people kneeling and bowing, the prayerful posture, and they begin to understand why. The "extras" on Holy Days and special occasions, Incense, Bells, Flowers, all add to the sense of being in a place where something MORE is happening. There is a feeling of anticipation and mystery, Tradition and ritual, that make them feel at home within the Mass. The boys always love the Triduum. It is long, but all of the ritual and tradition from year to year bring them closer to their Catholic family.
Participation: At Seven it is time to actively participate. I encourage this before this age, but at seven, in anticipation of the Sacraments that they will receive this year, I require it. I tell them that if they are not participating in the prayers and really paying attention, they shouldn't be going to Communion, so they need to practice responding and singing as they prepare. They are old enough to receive the Body of Christ and they are old enough to be present to Him in the Mass. I have found that they understand this very well and actually embrace the new responsibility as a sign that they are growing up. It makes them feel fully a part of the larger Church.
I have really enjoyed watching my little boys become "grown-up" in the Mass. They are always willing to go to any type of church activity and it really does my Mother's heart good when my sons sing, respond and serve at the Mass. When we get ready for daily Mass on Fridays, they are happy to go and in fact, John is always very disappointed when, because of illness or weather, we can't get there.
A little etiquette can go a long way in making this a peaceful and Joyful time, every time!
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
A Great Family Tool
Here is a great idea for organizing the family.
I have been using this organizer for years and I love it!
The layout is so easy to use and I love the fact that there is so much space to write in. I take it everywhere. I ended up buying the nylon cover because I always have a pencil, post-its and other helpful items tucked inside.
I used to use the Menu feature, but I don't anymore. I prefer the flexibility of spur of the moment meals right now. It is just the way things go around here.
I really need a planner when I am out. I use Google for all my time management needs at home, but I really need to have the planner for things like phone numbers, errands, and the details that I need at my fingertips when I am out.
I have used it to put down notes during three car accidents, 2 of Nina's and one of ours. It is really handy to be able to go back to that date and find the accident report #, the phone numbers of everyone involved, and all the info I collected at that time.
I have used it at meetings, to write notes and put dates on the calendar, and I keep phone lists in it.
I put down birthdays and try to remember to transfer all of them into the new one :)
It has really helped me to keep my time on track. I may look at others someday, but I really like supporting Amy. If you go to the website, read her story. It is very inspiring.
You can go to the website here.
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Elizabeth Foss
This is a blog entry that I found on "In the Heart of my Home"
Elizabeth Foss says it so well. It is worth sharing here and committing to my memory.April 03, 2008
Why Bother?
One thing that my massive clutter clear out has unexpectedly done for me, is give me some time and space to think about my role in my home and my goals for how I want to serve my family here. It's been a bit of an odyssey, actually. About a year ago, the house felt like the walls were closing in. I just could not seem to keep up. Two friends in particular offered me advice when I solicited it. One of them was local and one was a far-away friend. Both have known me for years. I went looking for home management advice and what I got from both was time management advice. They both said to back away from the computer. Both of these women understood online communities and were part of the same ones I was. And, frankly, their advice surprised me. I couldn't imagine backing away. So, I continued to bumble along, doing the best I could (which wasn't very good) to "balance" homeschooling, general parenting, being a wife, and my outreach on the computer. Oh, and the house. And frankly, the house didn't get much better.
My family and I went to visit another big homeschooling family. I've known this woman to be gracious and lovely. She is always nicely dressed and her children are always tidy and beautiful. The public areas in the front of her home are neat and welcoming. On this day, though, my husband was going to help with a repair, so we went into the parts of the house which were not public. Everywhere I looked was clutter. There were books and toys strewn about and piled high in the family room. The bathrooms were dingy. Upstairs, the beds were poorly made, if made at all, and the mattresses were sinking. Wallpaper was peeling. It was a shocking experience. Here was someone who clearly placed a great importance on her public image, but in the private parts of her home, there was no care at all. It mattered to her that her home welcome friends, but clearly she did not care to make it a haven for her family.
On the way home, my husband commented that he would not allow his family to live in such a home. This family had the means to make repairs and to maintain the home and the whole thing just really perplexed me. The public persona so conflicted with the private reality. And then, came the epiphany moment. Mike said, "I cannot imagine commuting every day into the city, working well after the dinner hour, and then coming home to that." He went on to explain that he would feel as if his hard work was not appreciated at all. As a provider of a home, he would be discouraged by how little regard his wife and children had for it.
Somewhere during the conversation, I began to understand that it was no longer about the other family, it was about mine. To what did my husband return everyday and how did my home reflect my priorities? Were the public places fine enough and the private places less so? My house did not look like the one we visited, but I definitely was a long way from having my home reflect the respect and appreciation I had for my husband and the sacrifice he was making for our family. Something was way out of balance.
I talked to my friend about her home, gingerly at first. She told me her husband didn't care. She was involved in a half dozen different ministries and he was very supportive of the way she was spending her time. I even asked if I could share this story. She told me to tell you that apostolic households are always messy. We agree to disagree. I think our first field of apostolate is to our family. And our homes are the mission field.
I love the book of Sirach. There are so many nuggets of wisdom for daily living there. We read:
Blessed the husband of a good wife,
twice-lengthened are his days;
A worthy wife brings joy to her husband,
peaceful and full is his life.
A good wife is a generous gift
bestowed upon him who fears the LORD;
Be he rich or poor, his heart is content,
and a smile is ever on his face.
A gracious wife delights her husband,
her thoughtfulness puts flesh on his bones;
A gift from the LORD is her governed speech,
and her firm virtue is of surpassing worth.
Choicest of blessings is a modest wife,
priceless her chaste soul.
A holy and decent woman adds grace upon grace;
indeed, no price is worthy of her temperate soul.
Like the sun rising in the LORD's heavens,
the beauty of a virtuous wife in her well-ordered home.
I cannot reconcile these beautiful verses with the idea that being busy with other projects excuses us from welcoming our husbands into well-ordered homes. I'm not talking about a mom with two toddlers and a baby who is struggling to keep up and feels like she's losing the fight. That's a season during which both husband and wife will grow. I'm talking about the veteran mom with a range of ages of children who makes choices every day to neglect her home. That is simply the fruit of bad habits and misplaced priorities.
I want to be a gracious wife, not just a gracious hostess. Not just a lovely face to the public, but a comfort and a blessing to my husband. So, why bother with homemaking? Because God call us to be virtuous wives and He tells us that virtuous wives live in well-ordered homes.
Ouch.
I wish could tell you that after that visit and that conversation with my husband, I reformed my ways, cleaned my house, and became the virtuous wife of Sirach. I didn't. I tried harder, but I still thought I could hang on to some of the bad habits that had gotten me--and my home--into this mess. I allowed myself to become distracted by internet "crises." And then, an honest friend told me that there are no internet crises. Nothing that happens on the internet is a crisis. There are urgent prayer concerns, but they don't require my presence in front of a screen. She was right; I could not really think of anything that could happen online that truly, truly needed me to rob time and attention from my family. In Sirach, God calls us to "governed speech." Whether on the phone or online, much of what we women engage in isn't governed speech at all, but idle, distracting chatter. We go in search of wisdom and inspiration or to offer encouragement and education and the devil has a field day with the mismanagement of our time.
I prayed hard about what God was saying and how gracious He had been to allow honest women of virtue to speak so frankly to me. I began to see how order and routine and constant, diligent care of our home would bless us all. And I began to see how homemaking called for my full time and attention. I've often heard it said that there are two kinds of large families: very organized ones and very disorganized ones. There is no middle ground. I believe that. I've lived in both. I much prefer the former.
I remember when the message board was founded. I showed my husband the beautiful pages and he was amazed. He did say one thing, though, that I'd nearly forgotten. He said it looked like it had the potential to take a lot of time. I promised him I'd never write there unless the laundry was caught up. And then I promptly forgot the promise. For three years:-).
Now, I understand how important that promise is to keep, even if it means I rarely get to post to online conversations. What I'm doing here in my home is too important. Order precedes beauty. Radiance is the goal. Our housekeeping routines are crucial to the smooth functioning of our days, our weeks. Life in a well-ordered home does shine. Radiance streams into our lives like the grace of God. Ordering a home isn't something you do once and it stays that way. Instead, it's a continual commitment. Nutritious meals served predictably and eaten together at a well set table lend a graciousness and civility to everyday life. It's nice to open a drawer and find clothing folded and ready regardless of the day of the week. It's a blessing to go to a closet, see freshly pressed shirts and inhale the sweet smell of herbal ironing spray. It's nice to settle to work at the learning room table and know where all the books are. My family deserves nothing less. Making it so requires all of me.
The Flylady talks about CHAOS--the "Can't Have Anybody Over Syndrome." Certainly, it would be a shame to not be able to have anybody over. But a greater shame, I think, is to neglect the people who actually live in a house by being a poor steward of both time and treasure. A greater shame, is for a hard working man to have to pick his way around the mess as he makes his way to a disheveled bedroom. A greater shame is to throw a meal at the kids and run to work on an outside project while they eat.
So why bother with all of this? Because a worthy wife brings joy to her husband, peaceful and full is his life. And her life, too, is full of peace and joy.
Letting go of Clutter
Tonight I am going to the College to teach a class for Nettie, for the second time.
I really enjoyed it the first time!
Nettie has a great slide show put together so all I have to do is share the slides. There are only eight students and it's a fun class to teach.
I'll post more about it later.
I really enjoyed it the first time!
Nettie has a great slide show put together so all I have to do is share the slides. There are only eight students and it's a fun class to teach.
I'll post more about it later.
Saturday, April 5, 2008
Googled Again!
I have heard about the most amazing new program!
Google has a VERY cool application for building presentations. It's just like Powerpoint. It's in Google "Documents" and it's called...drumroll...."Presentations". Great name huh?
The best thing about it is that it's FREE!!
I am working on a class that I will be helping out with in June. I started building my slide show and I am just having so much fun! I told John about it and he grabbed his camera, took a bunch of pictures, and put together his own slide show in about 10 minutes! He has used Powerpoint, but he loves having his own place to work in his documents.
The one I am doing is about organizing your homeschool, so the slide backgrounds are these cute little chalkboards. I can add pictures and lots of other nifty little gadgets.
The only thing I am concerned about is whether it's going to work with the college as far as getting the handouts printed.
I tell you Google just gets better and better.
Google has a VERY cool application for building presentations. It's just like Powerpoint. It's in Google "Documents" and it's called...drumroll...."Presentations". Great name huh?
The best thing about it is that it's FREE!!
I am working on a class that I will be helping out with in June. I started building my slide show and I am just having so much fun! I told John about it and he grabbed his camera, took a bunch of pictures, and put together his own slide show in about 10 minutes! He has used Powerpoint, but he loves having his own place to work in his documents.
The one I am doing is about organizing your homeschool, so the slide backgrounds are these cute little chalkboards. I can add pictures and lots of other nifty little gadgets.
The only thing I am concerned about is whether it's going to work with the college as far as getting the handouts printed.
I tell you Google just gets better and better.
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
To Time
Laura gave me a great blog entry idea.
She is starting a new blog to discuss things that make life easier. I had to think for a minute, but a couple of the things that I use pretty much constantly are my planner, and my Google Calendar.
The planner is great because it goes where I go and I can put in all my appointments as I make them, see what I already have, and keep notes about events. I put in phone numbers, keep stamps and address labels, always a pencil, and sticky notes. I never use pen to enter anything in the planner because everything changes so often in my family! I use Amy Knapp's Family Planner.
I transfer everything to my Google calendar, which has the added benefit of enabling me to set up separate calendars that can be clicked on and off. I can see everything that is going on all at once, or I can just look at just Scouts, or organizing appointments, or my personal calendar.
I made up a calendar just for birthdays. At the beginning of the month I look at the calendar and remind myself to send cards or gifts to the people on the list for that month. I plan to put the Saint's days for my family and Godchildren on it too.
You can check it out at: Google.com
Go to the page. At the top you can look for the heading "more" and then click it and go down the drop menu to "calendar".
Time management is so important to being well organized. I go a little crazy when I can't keep track of where to be and when. I have learned that EVERYTHING goes on the calendar, and I don't trust anything to my memory.
One of these days I have to post another of my favorite record keeping devices. My dear old "Homeschool Tracker".
She is starting a new blog to discuss things that make life easier. I had to think for a minute, but a couple of the things that I use pretty much constantly are my planner, and my Google Calendar.
The planner is great because it goes where I go and I can put in all my appointments as I make them, see what I already have, and keep notes about events. I put in phone numbers, keep stamps and address labels, always a pencil, and sticky notes. I never use pen to enter anything in the planner because everything changes so often in my family! I use Amy Knapp's Family Planner.
I transfer everything to my Google calendar, which has the added benefit of enabling me to set up separate calendars that can be clicked on and off. I can see everything that is going on all at once, or I can just look at just Scouts, or organizing appointments, or my personal calendar.
I made up a calendar just for birthdays. At the beginning of the month I look at the calendar and remind myself to send cards or gifts to the people on the list for that month. I plan to put the Saint's days for my family and Godchildren on it too.
You can check it out at: Google.com
Go to the page. At the top you can look for the heading "more" and then click it and go down the drop menu to "calendar".
Time management is so important to being well organized. I go a little crazy when I can't keep track of where to be and when. I have learned that EVERYTHING goes on the calendar, and I don't trust anything to my memory.
One of these days I have to post another of my favorite record keeping devices. My dear old "Homeschool Tracker".
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
I got this from Barbara Curtis' blog. It reminds me of my Grandma, who always wore aprons...
The History of Aprons
I don't think our kids know what an apron is.The principal use of Grandma's apron was to protect the dress underneath, but along with that, it served as a potholder for removing hot pans from the oven.
It was wonderful for drying children's tears, and on occasion was even used for cleaning out dirty ears.
From the chicken coop, the apron was used for carrying eggs, fussy chicks, and sometimes half-hatched eggs to be finished in the warming oven.
When company came, those aprons were ideal hiding places for shy kids.
And when the weather was cold, grandma wrapped it around her arms.
Those big old aprons wiped many a perspiring brow, bent over the hot wood stove.
Chips and kindling wood were brought into the kitchen in that apron.
From the garden, it carried all sorts of vegetables. After the peas had been shelled, it carried out the hulls.
In the fall, the apron was used to bring in apples that had fallen from the trees.
When unexpected company drove up the road, it was surprising how much furniture that old apron could dust in a matter of seconds.
When dinner was ready, Grandma walked out onto the porch, waved her apron, and the men knew it was time to come in from the fields to dinner.
It will be a long time before someone invents something that will replace that 'old-time apron' that served so many purposes.
Send this to those who would know and love the story about Grandma's aprons.
REMEMBER:
Grandma used to set her hot baked apple pies on the window sill to cool. Her granddaughters set theirs on the window sill to thaw.
They would go crazy now trying to figure out how many germs was on that apron.
I don't think I ever caught anything from an Apron!
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Menu Planning...
I saw a really neat idea awhile back.
When we have people over for dinner I always worry about whether or not I am constantly duplicating the menu. I also have some holiday menus that I want duplicate, for tradition's sake.
So I read this tip in an organizing manual.
Keep menus in your calendar.
When you have company, or a holiday get together, on the date that you write the event down, also write down the menu. You can even reference where you got the recipes so that you can make the exact same perfect meal!
Now Google Calendar is really great because you can make multiple calendars and view them separately. I made a "menus" calendar and I will be able to go back and see what we had for Easter this year and I can make notes about how to improve the items that I made.
I can do this for all the special dinners that I make. I can make notes about the likes, dislikes, allergies, etc, that are particular to the people that visit.
This can also be very helpful in preparing meals to welcome babies or help out a family in need. I always worry about how many times I have taken "Chicken etc!"
When we have people over for dinner I always worry about whether or not I am constantly duplicating the menu. I also have some holiday menus that I want duplicate, for tradition's sake.
So I read this tip in an organizing manual.
Keep menus in your calendar.
When you have company, or a holiday get together, on the date that you write the event down, also write down the menu. You can even reference where you got the recipes so that you can make the exact same perfect meal!
Now Google Calendar is really great because you can make multiple calendars and view them separately. I made a "menus" calendar and I will be able to go back and see what we had for Easter this year and I can make notes about how to improve the items that I made.
I can do this for all the special dinners that I make. I can make notes about the likes, dislikes, allergies, etc, that are particular to the people that visit.
This can also be very helpful in preparing meals to welcome babies or help out a family in need. I always worry about how many times I have taken "Chicken etc!"
Monday, March 24, 2008
Getting your balance...
Having a sense of order in our environment can be a way to establish control over some aspects of our lives. We may not be able to effect change within our workplaces, our children's schools, our circle of friends, but we have the ability to make our living space, time and habits as orderly and efficient as possible. We can feel a sense of personal accomplishment within the place that we call home.
Why do we want to be able to manage our homes well?
Why do we want to develop structure in the way we manage our time?
Why do we want to be better parents?
All of these things are positive, they move us forward and break the inertia of our old habits. They help us live more peacefully with others and carry over into our careers and other activities. They are also skills that will serve our children well. Cooking a healthy meal and eating together as a family seems to be a simple thing, it seems insignificant. This is a very positive activity in so many ways. It not only provides good nutrition, but also family time, manners and a sharing of our day. It is a time to reconnect.
Little steps and successes add up. Go slow and try to change one thing and make it a habit. Take pride in the small things. Clean clothes, clean kids, a new recipe, a clean floor. When you and your family start to experience the benefits of order and routine you will want to incorporate more and more systems into daily life.
Evaluate
One of the ways that we can identify and prioritize issues that are obstacles to efficiency, is to label each of the most likely challenges.
What are your Challenges?
1. Time- Some people really don't have much time to manage. Working moms, families with many children, someone who cares for a parent, etc. This requires an intensified time-management over-haul. Using any extra time you DO have to the greatest advantage.
There is another time challenge but it comes under a different heading: Time Use.
2.Time-Use- Here is the one we don't like to talk about. Now be honest, how do you use the time you do have? Is what you are labeling an organizational issue, really the lack of initiative and therefore the use of your time for other things?
I address this by having the client do a daily log of activities and show them where the time can come from and how to prioritize which things to accomplish with it.
3.Space- This is a common issue in large families. For some people this really is a problem. Too many people, too much stuff for the room you have. Organizing CAN be effective in dealing with this. Clutter removal is crucial as is setting standards and habit forming to maintain the reorganization. For other families it can just be an issue of using the space you do have more efficiently and keeping things put away. Location and area management are also key tools.
4.Energy-Some people can go all day, cook, clean, school, and still have time for themselves and their spouses at the end of the day. Others just DON"T. There is a need to address the reasons for this. Diet, exercise, sleep patterns, discouragement, hormones. All of these things need to be addressed for the low energy person. If even an extra hour of productive time can be given to the day, it's worth the effort.
5. Family- The dynamic within the family has to be one of the biggest challenges to organization and efficiency. Does the husband have a need for more organization, or less? Do the children have habits in place that are conducive to running a smooth household? Is the homemaker the only one making the effort at change? Who can she turn to within her family? Outside her family? A friend who can watch the kids while she works at home? Her husband taking them out on a Saturday?
Children do not have a magic moment of enlightenment when they just start running through the house looking for their things and stowing them in the proper places. Neither do they suddenly realize that it is inappropriate to drink Kool-aid in the living room on the couch. This is my greatest beef against sippy cups!! Habits are formed from the earliest days. Give them a sippy cup at the table! Give them WATER in a sippy cup if they have to carry one around. A very small child knows the difference between water and juice. (hint:they want juice!)
Also, the adults in the household HAVE to be willing to re-enforce the rules!!! NO, sorry dear, no beer in the living room either!
6.Habits/addictions- How much time do you spend in front of the TV? The computer? Is it easy to "just say no?'' or are you making excuses about the time you spend there? Shopping, even exercise. Is anything out of balance and are you avoiding other things because of your habits?
7.Clutter/Stuff- Are you challenged by the great economy? Do you just keep accumulating? Are you a pack rat? Is everything Grandma ever owned considered a precious heirloom? Do have a place for everything? If so why isn't it there? Do your kids help keeping their things put away? Do you just drop things where you last used them?
Do you need to have things visibly in front of you to remember where they are?
Not every Family has the same needs for organization. Some people are very functional amidst clutter. I cleaned house for a lady who just wanted me to dust UNDER the piles of stuff all over the house!
Determine the clutter comfort level in the family and then work to be SURE that everyone feels the same comfort. Children who need neatness may do better if they have a clutter free corner in which to school, build things, read etc. Some kids need a place for their piles. They will probably work better if they can see all their stuff! This is not a license to be a slob! They must not allow their things to drool into the rest of the house and it must be clean. No dirty laundry, dust, pet hair, etc! Piles can still be organized.
Each homemaker must evaluate her needs in this area. She must look at what she has and decide what she absolutely needs to change.
8. Attention/Perseverance-ADD is a bit overdone but everyone has a certain level of distractability. Is this your problem? Are you truly a person who gets started on something and then either you get distracted by a part of the job at hand, or you go off to feed a child a snack or let the dog out and never come back?
Do you give up easily? Do you just decide that half done is good enough, or is "What the Heck and What's the Point?" your mantra?
9. Life Experience- This is the biggest trap and the best excuse. You had parents. You had a mom. Was your house a mess? Were you frustrated or embarrassed by the condition of your environment? Did you even notice? Were your and your spouse's upbringings similar? If you were brought up by a slovenly mother in a house where the TV was on all day and frozen pizza was Haute Cuisine, and your husband was brought up by a neat-freak who had a housekeeper once a week and cooked for fun, there are going to be some issues! BUT DON'T LET YOUR PAST EXCUSE YOU! We are all called to be good stewards of our gifts. You just need a system and a new way of approaching your stewardship.
Triage
In beginning to develop systems that are going to stick, you need to do a bit of evaluating as far as 1. Where you WANT to start and 2. Where you NEED to start.
The flylady has some really great ideas and resources.
Sidetracked Home Executives is a great book to get you started. I don't think that it works for everyone though.
Some people thrive using a system that another person develops. It's great for those that can do it, but for many people it is doomed to eventual failure. One of the reasons the Weight Watchers works is because it uses real food in a realistic way and helps people develop new habits based on their actual reality and behavior. They begin to change their own habits, not try to take on a whole new way of eating and purchasing special foods or weightloss products. The WW program is based on changes of habits.
In the same way, our organized homes need to be lived in by the same people who have been living in chaos. You aren't going to take a book in hand and implement a system based on someone else's family.
Your family isn't suddenly going to have a revelation and become reborn through a conversion to organization.
I agree that baby steps and incremental habit building are the only ways to gradually transform yourself into one who thinks systematically, but they have to be steps within your family and your own personal system.
By developing systems within each area of your household you are building a program that can be used to create order and can be tweaked and reworked with the changes that every family goes through.
An orderly home, home-made and well balanced meals, a genuinely effective homeschool, a balanced financial situation, personal health (exercise) and time for prayer and family are all within reach.
Why do we want to be able to manage our homes well?
Why do we want to develop structure in the way we manage our time?
Why do we want to be better parents?
All of these things are positive, they move us forward and break the inertia of our old habits. They help us live more peacefully with others and carry over into our careers and other activities. They are also skills that will serve our children well. Cooking a healthy meal and eating together as a family seems to be a simple thing, it seems insignificant. This is a very positive activity in so many ways. It not only provides good nutrition, but also family time, manners and a sharing of our day. It is a time to reconnect.
Little steps and successes add up. Go slow and try to change one thing and make it a habit. Take pride in the small things. Clean clothes, clean kids, a new recipe, a clean floor. When you and your family start to experience the benefits of order and routine you will want to incorporate more and more systems into daily life.
Evaluate
One of the ways that we can identify and prioritize issues that are obstacles to efficiency, is to label each of the most likely challenges.
What are your Challenges?
1. Time- Some people really don't have much time to manage. Working moms, families with many children, someone who cares for a parent, etc. This requires an intensified time-management over-haul. Using any extra time you DO have to the greatest advantage.
There is another time challenge but it comes under a different heading: Time Use.
2.Time-Use- Here is the one we don't like to talk about. Now be honest, how do you use the time you do have? Is what you are labeling an organizational issue, really the lack of initiative and therefore the use of your time for other things?
I address this by having the client do a daily log of activities and show them where the time can come from and how to prioritize which things to accomplish with it.
3.Space- This is a common issue in large families. For some people this really is a problem. Too many people, too much stuff for the room you have. Organizing CAN be effective in dealing with this. Clutter removal is crucial as is setting standards and habit forming to maintain the reorganization. For other families it can just be an issue of using the space you do have more efficiently and keeping things put away. Location and area management are also key tools.
4.Energy-Some people can go all day, cook, clean, school, and still have time for themselves and their spouses at the end of the day. Others just DON"T. There is a need to address the reasons for this. Diet, exercise, sleep patterns, discouragement, hormones. All of these things need to be addressed for the low energy person. If even an extra hour of productive time can be given to the day, it's worth the effort.
5. Family- The dynamic within the family has to be one of the biggest challenges to organization and efficiency. Does the husband have a need for more organization, or less? Do the children have habits in place that are conducive to running a smooth household? Is the homemaker the only one making the effort at change? Who can she turn to within her family? Outside her family? A friend who can watch the kids while she works at home? Her husband taking them out on a Saturday?
Children do not have a magic moment of enlightenment when they just start running through the house looking for their things and stowing them in the proper places. Neither do they suddenly realize that it is inappropriate to drink Kool-aid in the living room on the couch. This is my greatest beef against sippy cups!! Habits are formed from the earliest days. Give them a sippy cup at the table! Give them WATER in a sippy cup if they have to carry one around. A very small child knows the difference between water and juice. (hint:they want juice!)
Also, the adults in the household HAVE to be willing to re-enforce the rules!!! NO, sorry dear, no beer in the living room either!
6.Habits/addictions- How much time do you spend in front of the TV? The computer? Is it easy to "just say no?'' or are you making excuses about the time you spend there? Shopping, even exercise. Is anything out of balance and are you avoiding other things because of your habits?
7.Clutter/Stuff- Are you challenged by the great economy? Do you just keep accumulating? Are you a pack rat? Is everything Grandma ever owned considered a precious heirloom? Do have a place for everything? If so why isn't it there? Do your kids help keeping their things put away? Do you just drop things where you last used them?
Do you need to have things visibly in front of you to remember where they are?
Not every Family has the same needs for organization. Some people are very functional amidst clutter. I cleaned house for a lady who just wanted me to dust UNDER the piles of stuff all over the house!
Determine the clutter comfort level in the family and then work to be SURE that everyone feels the same comfort. Children who need neatness may do better if they have a clutter free corner in which to school, build things, read etc. Some kids need a place for their piles. They will probably work better if they can see all their stuff! This is not a license to be a slob! They must not allow their things to drool into the rest of the house and it must be clean. No dirty laundry, dust, pet hair, etc! Piles can still be organized.
Each homemaker must evaluate her needs in this area. She must look at what she has and decide what she absolutely needs to change.
8. Attention/Perseverance-ADD is a bit overdone but everyone has a certain level of distractability. Is this your problem? Are you truly a person who gets started on something and then either you get distracted by a part of the job at hand, or you go off to feed a child a snack or let the dog out and never come back?
Do you give up easily? Do you just decide that half done is good enough, or is "What the Heck and What's the Point?" your mantra?
9. Life Experience- This is the biggest trap and the best excuse. You had parents. You had a mom. Was your house a mess? Were you frustrated or embarrassed by the condition of your environment? Did you even notice? Were your and your spouse's upbringings similar? If you were brought up by a slovenly mother in a house where the TV was on all day and frozen pizza was Haute Cuisine, and your husband was brought up by a neat-freak who had a housekeeper once a week and cooked for fun, there are going to be some issues! BUT DON'T LET YOUR PAST EXCUSE YOU! We are all called to be good stewards of our gifts. You just need a system and a new way of approaching your stewardship.
Triage
In beginning to develop systems that are going to stick, you need to do a bit of evaluating as far as 1. Where you WANT to start and 2. Where you NEED to start.
- The first suggestion I have is to start with a place that you WANT to be. It can be any room, part of a room, a corner. Your living room, bedroom, bathroom, but it has to be a place that you relax. It needs to be a place that you go to to sit, read, Pray, visit with friends. A place you like to be. Now this is going to be YOUR space. Make it the way you like it. Put away any clutter, clear out things that don't belong. Papers, books, clothing, toys, anything that doesn't belong. Straighten, rearrange, dust, vacuum, spot clean the carpet. If it's the Bathroom you like, if bathing relaxes you, clean all surfaces til they shine, put away tub toys, get some pretty soap and a few new towels. Tell the kids "hands off" the new stuff and place liquid soap and a "kids Towel" for them. Put all toothbrushes, cups, etc. out of sight. Candles can be placed in any room in the house where you like to relax.Now this space is "your nest". It's OK for you to have this for yourself! It's OK to ask that the kids clear out the toys after they have played with them in "your parlor". It's OK to ask your husband to put the papers he is working on somewhere else, or offer to find a file folder for him. It's OK to tell the family that "Your Bathroom" must be picked up and kept after. This space is where you go to enjoy order and to relax.
- The next rule is: use it!! You need to take the time to enjoy this place and your free time. Go there and spend time with your husband and share your day. Take a youngster there to read a book. Notice how nice it is that you don't have to look at clutter and converging chaos. This is going to be your stronghold. No matter what else you are dealing with in the house, this place remains clutter free. No clothing, folded or unfolded may grace the chairs. No paperwork, schoolwork, sewing,etc is left there. This is a great place to start a habit. Get used to the way order feels and how to maintain it. Help the family start some good habits by being firm about this space.
- After "Your Space" has become a solid habit. Or maybe a little before, It's time to tackle the next obstacle. The Place you need. This is really just going to have to be the kitchen. You may love this room or avoid it, but you do have to go there, and until it's under control everything else is going to keep feeling like it's sliding back into chaos.You may not like to cook. Why? Is it because you don't know how or because you have to tackle the breakfast and lunch dishes before you can start dinner. Is it because it is such a chore to find anything in your cupboards that you are now just cooking out of boxes? Is it because the counters are so cluttered that you can't find a place to work? You may LOVE to cook, but it takes so much out of you that it's just not worth it.A lot can be done with a few well ingrained habits and a LOT of organization.Change the way the kitchen is set up. keep the counters clear by finding a place for everything, even if you have to get another cabinet or use another part of the house to store some things, or give something away.
- Start with the sink. If you have a dishwasher always empty it and put everything away as soon as it finishes running. If it's full and there are still dishes that need washing, fill the sink and wash them and put them away. I don't have a dishwasher. I did, but I quit using it because I found that it was just easier to wash everything and put it away all at once, instead of always having things sitting around waiting to be washed or having to wash something by hand anyway because I needed it before a load would run. Saves on the power and water bill too.
- After you wash the dishes, empty the wash water and rinse out the sink. Take a good look at that empty sink! Looks good huh? how long did it really take? If I can't get to the breakfast dishes right after breakfast, because we are starting school, I run very hot water, and put in the dish soap, then I rinse all the dishes and put them in the water until a bit later in the morning, after I have started everyone on a subject. You may have a young "dishwasher" in the family. Tell the Breakfast person that they need to get up and eat a bit earlier so that they can be doing the breakfast dishes as the rest of the family finishes.
- Clear the counters. Put away ALL traces of breakfast, lunch, or whatever you were doing. CAYG. Clean As You GO. This is a golden rule in the kitchen. You may have to put the brakes on the rest of the family using the kitchen at will for awhile. When they learn your system, where to put things and to clean up after themselves, you will have help, not the undoing of what you are trying to instill.
The flylady has some really great ideas and resources.
Sidetracked Home Executives is a great book to get you started. I don't think that it works for everyone though.
Some people thrive using a system that another person develops. It's great for those that can do it, but for many people it is doomed to eventual failure. One of the reasons the Weight Watchers works is because it uses real food in a realistic way and helps people develop new habits based on their actual reality and behavior. They begin to change their own habits, not try to take on a whole new way of eating and purchasing special foods or weightloss products. The WW program is based on changes of habits.
In the same way, our organized homes need to be lived in by the same people who have been living in chaos. You aren't going to take a book in hand and implement a system based on someone else's family.
Your family isn't suddenly going to have a revelation and become reborn through a conversion to organization.
I agree that baby steps and incremental habit building are the only ways to gradually transform yourself into one who thinks systematically, but they have to be steps within your family and your own personal system.
By developing systems within each area of your household you are building a program that can be used to create order and can be tweaked and reworked with the changes that every family goes through.
An orderly home, home-made and well balanced meals, a genuinely effective homeschool, a balanced financial situation, personal health (exercise) and time for prayer and family are all within reach.
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Why I am an efficiency nut...
I get a kick out of systems. I love figuring out the best way to do anything to make the job go more smoothly.
I thrive on order and I am happiest when I am working around my house, doing the simplest things in the most efficient and logical way that I can come up with. That doesn't mean that everything in my house is logical or efficient, it just means that I like to tackle the things that don't work well and make them work better.
I like managing my time, space and materials and improving a little each day by tweaking the systems that I have put in place.
I decided to start this blog to have a place for my writings and notes related to organizing.
I will post the things I have already written and as I find new and interesting ways to do things, I will share them.
Since I am a Homeschooling mom, many of the topics will pertain to organizing within the Home school.
My systems are mine, I have developed them for my home and family, for my schooling needs, but the way I got to where I am is certainly simple. Anyone can find the level of order that their particular family needs.
My house isn't fancy, new or full of ingenious time saving devices, in fact I don't even own a dishwasher, but my home works. It runs smoothly and well. It's just a matter of habits.
I'll be sharing ways to develop these as I go along.
I thrive on order and I am happiest when I am working around my house, doing the simplest things in the most efficient and logical way that I can come up with. That doesn't mean that everything in my house is logical or efficient, it just means that I like to tackle the things that don't work well and make them work better.
I like managing my time, space and materials and improving a little each day by tweaking the systems that I have put in place.
I decided to start this blog to have a place for my writings and notes related to organizing.
I will post the things I have already written and as I find new and interesting ways to do things, I will share them.
Since I am a Homeschooling mom, many of the topics will pertain to organizing within the Home school.
My systems are mine, I have developed them for my home and family, for my schooling needs, but the way I got to where I am is certainly simple. Anyone can find the level of order that their particular family needs.
My house isn't fancy, new or full of ingenious time saving devices, in fact I don't even own a dishwasher, but my home works. It runs smoothly and well. It's just a matter of habits.
I'll be sharing ways to develop these as I go along.
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